SERENADE PUNTA CANA BEACH & SPA RESORT

I must preface this review with a reminder to my readers that everything I write is completely subjective, based on my personal experience and never based on personal relationships with those offering the services of either hotels, restaurants or other venues. I wish to be informative, without bias.

I arrived at this newer resort in Punta Cana knowing nothing about it, other than what appears on their website and on social media. I checked in and asked to briefly greet the sales manager, with whom I had had a couple of email exchanges prior to my trip, simply to introduce myself, share my business card and thank her. She was very cordial but very hurried. I was not given a map of the resort, or instructions on how to navigate the system, which is different at every property. I found my room on my own and must say I was impressed.

The property is beautiful, it is spotless, the rooms are large as are the bathrooms, furnished in a very minimalist modern way, yet with much storage space and thankfully several USB ports for charging electronics ( something I expect these days, particularly in newer hotels). There are 6 buildings, three on each side separated in the center by two very large pools. Each building has four floors with a mix of swim up ground floor jr suites as well as regular jr suites and large two room suites. There’s also a premier section of the hotel with upgraded amenities and separate pool area which can be accessed only if  your room is booked in that category.

I don’t know about you, but when on a vacation, I don’t want to have a schedule or be compelled to jump through hoops to get certain basic things accomplished. After all they sell themselves as a 5 star property. For example, at arrival everyone is given a towel card which allows you one beach or pool towel. You need to go to a booth (which was inconveniently located) to exchange the card for a towel, and then return the towel to the same location at the end of the day. The process is then repeated each day you’re there. I find that annoying…is it just me?

There are signs throughout the property indicating directions in order to make it easier to find restaurants and bars. I found some of the bars were non-existent. The bar serving the main pool also served the entire beach, so it got a bit crowded compelling one to wait. There is no waiter service. The swim up portion of the bar was unattended the entire time I was there. To access the bar menu, you had to download a barcode which I found cumbersome and at times inaccessible. There is no premium liquor that I could find anywhere and the drinks were unimaginative, watery and overall disappointing. On a positive note the staff around the pool and beach was pleasant, friendly and helpful.

Food is what at times cements the memory of a resort either in a positive or negative way. Unfortunately in the case of this resort the food throughout was memorably unappealing and remarkably mediocre. For lunch you have the choice of two buffet restaurants: one large one and another a “ Mexican” one which was smaller and surprisingly offered very similar food, just fewer choices. For dinner there is the same large buffet restaurant, or a sports bar which features the usual offerings you might expect at any sports bar. This one, once again, disappointing ( I’m trying to be kind here!). Worst hamburger I ever tasted….I’ll leave it at that.

To access the speciality restaurants you have to find the desk where two young ladies will help you make a reservation. I found the desk by chance especially because there was no sign anywhere indicating that it was the reservation desk, rather a makeshift folding table. However, what they don’t tell you is that if you arrive anytime after 10 or 11 am, those restaurants are full and you have to return the next morning to attempt a reservation again. I walked by the restaurants and despite being half empty, without a reservation, you were turned away. Please don’t ask me why I avoid “Italian” restaurants at all inclusive restaurants in the Caribbean…thank you! The other choices were a Mediterranean restaurant and an Asian one.  I was  able to secure a reservation at their “ premier” restaurant; a steakhouse called CUT, which everyone assured me was the very best. The ambiance screamed steak house, so I thought I scored gold! Again the menu can only be accessed online by scanning the barcode ( annoying). I chose a Caesar salad ( it was identical to the one I saw served at the sports bar) followed by churrasco. The meat arrived flanked by a tired and truly unappealing portion of mashed potatoes, over boiled asparagus , mushy mushrooms and a small slice of corn on the cob. The meat was tough, stringy and flavorless. The wine I was served was also of very low quality. After that, I avoided the specialty restaurants and simply grazed at the buffet.

I have stayed in two and three star hotels and have eaten in dives, but they never pretended to be more than what they were. I enjoyed the food in many of those places more than I did here. I am simply annoyed by venues that sell themselves as 5 star, or “deluxe” and don’t produce the quality they portray on their websites. I visit as many places as I can so that I may steer my clients correctly, depending on their expectations. I hope you read this in the spirit it was written, one of constructive criticism.